1:01 AM
6:10 PM
i lurve SATURDAYS!!!
started off the day with Eve and gang at villa bali in preparation for her wedding. it really is so much fun playing and experimenting with the different equipments, music and even walking! there was a fair bit of mozzies and the sun though. other than that, it was a great time knowing new people, learning new things and playing with ryan's new camera. i could really get the hang of helping to plan and prepare for weddings. =P (wedding planners for hire?)
was tremendously blessed by rev casey treat's sermon. was uber power-packed. so i'm going again with my members today! *whee* going on to build greater core strength!
chocolate fondue was a hilarious time with everyone "playing" with the satay sticks and fruits. in other words, we were all pretty filled! shixian did a mini performance for us with her 'ling' and samuel played a few tunes on his clarinet. simply awesome! w466 got talents!!! sure looking forward to the DIY shoe session next saturday! (Eve's wedding too!!!)
and after which, we had surprise birthday celebrations for kai lin. the expressions on her face were really of brillance. love the red tomatoes! =p
now, i shall have a fruitful sunday studying hard for tmr's paper...
11:04 AM
The backdoor is now permanently shut. It is only onward and to keep on riding on the wings of prayer until we overcome the situations that comes in like the flood!
And I'm glad that I made the effort to honor my leaders and celebrate their special day with them. No more small fish in big pond mentality! Got really inspired too!
Didn't really get to study as I was thinking through some stuff. Many things I don't understand and still have a lot of 'whys' going on but I'm learning to surrender them. I don't have to know. The only thing I need to know is that I am in God's will and that He is in control.
Even as things unfolded throughout the day, I'm learning to see things from God's perspective - how He is bringing the work He started in me into completion and what happens when we learn to trust in Him. And now as I come to the end of the day, I have the peace of mind to rest and the serenity to accept things the way they are and how it has turned out. I know that there is a greater purpose behind all that have had happened and nothing will be in vain. Like what the bible says, to everything there is a season and to every season a purpose. Things can only get better as we get closer to the purpose. :)
Once again, I just wanna celebrate my friends that I've been blessed with. They are really such a treasure! I'm touched by how "daddy" actually teared while praying for me and a 太公that is continually showing his unwavering and "silent" support and caring for each of us in the ministry. And Cheryl for the ears that listen and the hugs that she gives. *touched* I would never exchange them for anything else or anyone else. And as I rough it out, I know that I will have this group of people that I can fall back on and also FOTS, both who never fails to remind me of the privileged position that I am in W466. Thanks guys for believing in me and keeping me in prayers!
Love,
Rui
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12:36 AM
And the little things that were spoken are enough to allow me to keep on trusting and carry on. And still, continually be given to prayer.
There were so many things I wanted to be, so many ideals that I've have had. Good ones but never quite God-given ones. And putting it all aside, I'm waiting on God for Him to speak that breakthrough in my life. What is standing between me and God right at this time? Why is that an area that I thought that I've surrendered it totally to only realize that there is more to it?
I don't want to live on the good, knowing that He has the best in store for me. It is living on compromise. And while waiting for the best, I need to and am gonna continue to give my best in all that I'm doing. In the midst of it all, I want to develop focus - can do does not equal must do. I need to know why I'm doing what I'm doing. Similarly, I need to exercise expectations management.
Since young, I've always been dreaming of my ideal friendship and love story - what it would be really like. Friendship takes hard work and just like the best things in life, they will cost you something. Are we willing to take that effort to inform, to reply that sms, to sow, to still accept the person for the way they are and to exercise loving correction? To receive, we all need to first give...
I am very much overwhelmed by the love of the friendships that I've built over the past year. Everyone taught me the value and what it means to love and give. I'm very blessed and I count them as blessings to me everyday. The love gift from eileen, cheryl, brian, weiliang, ziyun, zhitai, esther, bestie, weiliang and joyce just left me in awe. No words can describe their generosity and love. I'm looking forward to see greater things out of the friendship that I have with each of them, growing in love and maturity.
I want to be (become) the very person God created me to be, taking time to grow and develop. There are enough of every other being that is around already. And I'm thankful to friends that are helping me to take steps to be progressively so. :)
And with regards to the perfect love story,
God, hold me and lead me on. You are my all sustaining love...
The greatest love story that I've known is the one of Him lovingly pick me up each time I falter and walk away. And that is the kind of love that I want to grow and walk into - the perfect love of Christ.
I'm blessed and loved...
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5:33 PM
He reiterated today on the importance of faithfulness in the little things and also in having humility. It is so easy that as we do more and get more that we slip into a situation that prides sets in and we get bossy and all self-important. I'm challenged when Pst share with us how Pst Abraham Ku had such great humility and in that moment, he then got on course with what God have for his life. And till today, he is still a person of such great humility. And with no doubt, he is influencing the echleon of the media industry with his ministry!
From time to time, I get a bit irked when ppl starts to qn me, esp pple that are younger or those that I'm not very close to. Need to learn to be more open while setting the right boundaries in place. Being open to people to tell you what went wrong is part of humility.
another area that I continually am reminded of is to be thankful in all things, through all things. Learning to love my cg more by the day. Some of them are really just amazing. The more time I spend with them, the more I learn about them, the more I love them. They really make the best cgms that I can have. I would never want the cg to become a place of ministry to me but a place of love and friendships - people that I call my friends, sisters and brothers. I want to be faithful in delivering my promises to them and press into their lives. Special shout-out to alicia, crystal and david for being so willing to stand in the gap to do things and learn. Thank youi for rising up to the occasion today so that I could meet a need that my dad had and to honor him. It wld not have been possible if you guys did not took ownership. Thanks!
And I enjoyed my time with daddy. Really really glad that I can communicate with him more these days and that we're becoming more like friends than the fear that I used to have of him. Had fun cooking the noodles that the customers ordered. Been a loooong looong time since I last did that. Maybe the next time when my friends pop by and visit me when I'm working, I could cook for them. Hopefully I would have learnt how to roast sth by den! Maybe I shld really go and learn this december before going to korea. Anw, working alongside with daddy today was just GREAT! Whee! (But I probably still won't want to go down every weekend...)
A little prayer that I said...
God, You hear my prayer. Less dependence on someone, less independence but total dependence on You. I want to be loyal to you. I can't stand it to have a heart of mixture before You. I want to say that I have laid it all down at the foot of the cross, giving all of me in exchange for all of You. Help me to be able to dream those dreams that I once dreamt of. Renew my vision, renew my calling, show me my destiny in You. Help me to see the 50 by the end of this year. Let nothing stand bwt me and this dream that you've put in my heart - this promise that I hold till today. Grant me the courage to fight for the broken and wounded. Use me as a peacemaker to restore strained relationships bwt parents and children. I want to be a vessel that you can work through, giving my life in exchange to make the lives of the others around me a better one. Show me how to bring hope to those who don't see a future and help them to believe in the potential that they have. Use me to raise up the people of the next generation for you. In Jesus name I pray, amen.
Rui
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7:45 PM
现在的我的情绪有一点低落.
并不喜欢毫无方向感的人生。而缺这就是我现在属于的状态。
own time own target 有它的好处但毫无目标的往前的确很辛苦。最糟的是不清楚自己是否真的在往前。
i need some indicators to keep moving on. i need to know that i'm in tandem with God's will for my life. but it has gone all quiet now. or is it that i have been so busy and caught up that i've not been listening?
不喜欢毫无次序和规律的生活。
i need some order.
我需要懂得如何制造自己的私人空间和如何向人说不。
i don't want to become a person of compliance and compromise.
虽然他的恩典足够与我但我不想 take it for granted.
i want to become a more effective individual - one that leads by example.
help me to become a better person for you...
12:19 AM
10:37 PM
1:03 AM